A Last Will & Testament is a written statement that explains how you want your belongings to be distributed to loved ones or charitable organizations after your death. A last will must be written with a sound mind, and is considered invalid if that is not the case, and in most states, you must be 18 years of age or older for the document to be considered legal. If you don’t have a will when you die, then your property will be handled by a probate court, and may be distributed differently than you would prefer.

A Living Will is an outline of important health care decisions, such as organ donation and whether or not to remain on artificial life support. A living will is drawn up in advance of facing such decisions. Living wills and advance directives describe your preferences for end-of-life care. These documents speak for you when you’re not able to speak for yourself.

By planning ahead, you can get the medical care you want, avoid unnecessary suffering and relieve caregivers of decision-making burdens during moments of crisis or grief. You also help reduce confusion or disagreement about the choices you would want people to make on your behalf.

See also: How do I write a Last Will & Testament?

You can download state-specific forms for advance directives via the National Hospice and Palliative Care Association’s Caring Pages.

 

Note: This page is for general information purposes. We recommend you seek the advice of an attorney for legal matters.

An epitaph is the wording placed on a headstone to describe the person buried there. In addition to the name, dates of birth and death, and family relationships, epitaphs often feature a quote or statement commemorating the person’s life. Many of these quotes and statements are reverent or religious, while others are humorous or philosophical. They can also be as simple as “R.I.P.” for “Rest in Peace.”

The Museum’s tagline is an epitaph: “Any day above ground is a good one.” Here are some other examples to get you started in drafting one for yourself or a loved one.

REVERENT & RELIGIOUS

Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. –  23rd Psalm

Whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have eternal life. –  John 3:15

Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal

PHILOSOPHICAL

Your presence is a gift to the world, you’re unique and one of a kind. Your life can be what you want it to be. Take it one day at a time.

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

HUMOROUS

Rest in Peace Nathaniel Ward
His Chevy Nova hit a Ford

He was a simple man who died of complications

Owen Moore has passed away
Owin’ more than he could pay

SIMPLY STATED / WORDS OF COMFORT

Rest in Peace

Forever in our hearts

Gone, but not forgotten

In Loving Memory of

To live in the hearts of those we love is never to die

For additional examples see British memorial company Set in Stone’s  list of epitaphs.

A legal document called a “power of attorney” gives an individual the legal authority to make decisions for an incapacitated person. This type of document is usually drawn up before the person is incapacitated. The laws for creating a power of attorney vary from state to state, but there are certain general guidelines to follow. A power of attorney document may be drawn up to give a trusted friend or relative the authority to deal with only one particular issue (a specific power of attorney), or to handle most of the incapacitated person’s personal and financial matters (a general power of attorney).

The individual with power of attorney may be responsible for making financial decisions, monetary gifts, heath care decisions (including the ability to consent to giving, withholding, or stopping medical treatments, services, or diagnostic procedures), and recommending a guardian for the incapacitated person.

Often times, individuals will engage the services of an attorney or lawyer to draft a Power of Attorney document.

For more information refer to Caregivers Library.

Note: This page is for general information purposes. We recommend you seek the advice of an attorney for legal matters. Additionally, before you or a loved one signs any documents, be sure to consult with an attorney concerning all applicable laws and regulations.

DNRs and DNIs are legal orders that tell a health care team what measures a patient does not want to receive in the event of a life-threatening health crisis. DNR or “Do Not Resuscitate” means that no CPR (chest compressions, cardiac drugs, or placement of a breathing tube) will be performed. A DNI or “Do Not Intubate” order means that chest compressions and cardiac drugs may be used, but no breathing tube will be placed.

It’s best to discuss DNR and DNI orders and other end-of-life care issues with the patient’s health care team before a crisis occurs. You don’t need to have a formal advance directive or living will to have DNR and DNI orders in place. You can make your preferences known to your physician, who can write the orders and put them in your medical record. If you have a living will, however, be sure to mention whether you have a DNR or DNI order on record.

For further information: see the Mayo Clinic’s page on Advanced Directives.

Note: This page is for general information purposes. We recommend you seek the advice of an attorney for legal matters.

No matter what our beliefs, the fact is when humans die the body remains. In most cases, relatives and/or friends see to it the body is handled in the way the deceased had specified. There are a wide range of choices available today. Which option would you choose?

Embalming – A chemical process that delays decomposition of a deceased body and helps preserve the body for a period of time. In most cases, embalming is a choice, although in some states, the law requires embalming (check with your local and state laws). Often times, embalming is recommended in order to provide families the necessary time for burial and funeral preparation, including travel time for out of town family and friends. Embalming is also recommended, and in some cases required, for the body to travel long distance, such as to another state or another country, to its final resting place.

Traditional burial – A form of disposition where a body, either embalmed or not, is placed in a burial container such as a casket or coffin and then buried in the ground or placed in a mausoleum.

Green burial – Involves the deceased being placed (with no embalming) in a biodegradable casket or a shroud (cloth body wrapping), and then buried in a green cemetery or cemeteries with green sections, where the body naturally decays and returns to nature over time.

Cremation – Traditional, flame-based cremation requires heating the body to over 1600 degrees Fahrenheit and releases carbon dioxide into the atmosphere during the heating process. A recent, more eco-friendly alternative is resomation, or bio-cremation, which uses water and only requires heating to 350 F. Cremation allows for ashes to be kept in an urn by a relative(s) or friend(s) or dispersed as mentioned below.

Options for cremated remains – After cremation, ashes are placed in an urn. Then, loved ones might opt to keep those cremated remains in their personal possession in the urn, bury the urn in the ground or have the urn placed in a niche in a columbarium or mausoleum. Portions of ashes can also be parceled out to friends and family members in a keepsake urn or jewelry, scattered in a special place, turned into diamonds or coral reefs, become fireworks, swirled into a glass keepsake and/or get flown into outer space. There are many options, not just one. For more information on cremation, visit www.cremationassociation.org.

WHAT IS A LAST WILL & TESTAMENT?

A Last Will & Testament is a written statement that explains how you want your belongings to be distributed to loved ones or charitable organizations after your death.

HOW DO I WRITE A LAST WILL & TESTAMENT?

A good start is to simply type up which items you wish to be given and who you want to receive them. Be sure to clearly state that this document is your Last Will & Testament. Note that a Last Will & Testament must be written with a sound mind, and is considered invalid if that is not the case. In most states, you must be 18 years of age or older for the document to be considered legal. You must also name an executor, who will make sure your Last Will & Testament is carried out properly.

If you don’t have a Last Will & Testament when you die, then your property will be handled by a probate court, and may be distributed differently than you would prefer. It’s a good idea to get legal consultation to be able to understand the laws of your state, such as community property laws, which transfer half of your assets to your surviving spouse, no matter what percentage you specify in your Last Will & Testament, but it isn’t necessarily required in order for your Last Will & Testament to be legally recognized.

The Last Will & Testament is not to be confused with a Living Will. Click here to learn more about the difference between these two documents—a Last Will & Testament versus a Living Will. For a Living Will, it is recommended to consult with a medical professional who can guide you through the difficult medical decisions covered in a Living Will.

For more detailed information on wills, see the US government’s personal finance page on writing a will or the AARP’s tips on this topic.

 

Note: This page is for general information purposes. We recommend you seek the advice of an attorney for legal matters.

Writing an obituary for a friend or family member can be a difficult and daunting task. If you plan to run the obituary in a newspaper, be sure to check with the newspaper regarding its deadlines, length/word count and cost. The funeral home staff will often help with this process and may be able to help you submit the obituary or a simple death announcement. You may also want to read a few examples from that newpaper’s obituary section.

You’ll need to gather basic information, such as name, age, date of death, city of residence, birthdate, spouse/partner’s name, names of family members and so on (see checklist below). Be sure to include the location, date and time of services, if available. If services have not yet been arranged, then list the funeral home that will be handling the services, so people can inquire about services.

It’s also important to include details and memories that celebrate the person’s life, such as memorable quotations or descriptions of their unique character.

Use this checklist to walk you through this challenging task.

Note: This is a comprehensive list, which means not everything on the list might be relevant to your specific situation. Feel free to omit some items as you and/or family members see fit.

NAME / ANNOUNCEMENT

Full name of the deceased, including nickname, if any

Age at death

Residence (for example, the name of the city) at death

Day and date of death (include the year)

Place of death

Cause of death

LIFE

Date of birth

Place of birth

Names of parents

Childhood: siblings, stories, schools, friends

Marriage(s): date of, place, name of spouse

Education: school, college, university and other

Designations, awards, and other recognition

Employment: jobs, professional organizations (if active), stories, colleagues

Places of residence

Hobbies, sports, interests, activities of particular enjoyment

Charitable, religious, fraternal, political, and other affiliations; positions held

Achievements

Disappointments

Unusual attributes, humor, other stories

FAMILY

Survived by (and place of residence):

Spouse

Children (in order of date of birth, and their spouses)

Grandchildren

Great-grandchildren

Great-great-grandchildren

Parents

Grandparents

Siblings (in order of date of birth)

Others, such as nephews, nieces, cousins, in-laws

Friends

Pets (if appropriate)

Preceded in death by (and date of death):

Spouse

Children (in order of date of birth)

Grandchildren

Siblings (in order of date of birth)

Others, such as nephews, nieces, cousins, in-laws

Pets (if appropriate)

SERVICE

Day, date, time, place

Name of officiant, pallbearers, honorary pallbearers, other information

Visitation information if applicable: day, date, time, place

Reception information if applicable: day, date, time, place

Other memorial, vigil, or graveside services if applicable: day, date, time, place

Place of interment

Name of funeral home in charge of arrangements

Where to call for more information (even if no service planned)

END

Memorial funds established

Memorial donation suggestions, including addresses

Thank you to people, groups, or institutions

Quotation or poem

A few words or a phrase that sum up the person’s life

FOR FURTHER REFERENCE

Wiki How: Write an Obituary

For sample obituary templates, click here.

WHAT IS A EULOGY?

A eulogy is a speech that celebrates or pays tribute to someone who has died. A eulogy is quite similar to an obituary, but it is intended to be read aloud before a gathering of the deceased’s family and friends. This spoken tribute is intended to honor the person who has passed, as well as connect with the audience and share in the memory of the deceased.

See also: How do I write an obituary?

HOW DO I WRITE A EULOGY?

Timing: Keep it relatively brief, a few minutes is usually about right. For a five-minute spoken eulogy, aim to write approximately 500 words.

Organize your speech: Create a structure that is easy to follow, such as chronological, reverse chronological or based on a theme or metaphor.

Write for speaking: Don’t write in a formal tone, write the way you speak. Consider speaking from notes, rather than “reading” full sentences directly in order to keep your delivery natural.

Practice: Rehearse delivering the eulogy and get feedback on your speech in advance. Speak slowly and clearly. Breathe normally and have a glass of water handy.

Have a back-up: If you feel overly nervous or get emotional, you may want to have a back-up speaker standing by. Let that person read your eulogy before the service, so they will be prepared. (This could be the funeral celebrant.)

For further reference: http://www.obituaryguide.com/eulogies.php